Happiest wishes to my buddy, Caryn

You know, this interwebs/blogosphere is a pretty neat place for people who suffer from any sort of malady or find themselves, willing or unwilling, in a niche of some sort. In the old days, how would you find other ladies to spill your guts about infertility? I'm not too much of a joiner in person -- I prefer one-on-one getting-to-know you contact. I'll never be the loudest one in the room and I don't like being the center of attention, so group settings like Resolve, as awesome as they are, don't really work for me. But thanks to the internet, I've found so many of you cool ladies (and a few guys). You understood what I was going through, most often explained it better than I ever could and I've learned (and continue to learn) so much from all of you.

Way back in January 2007, I started TTCing. For the first 18 months of TTCing I didn't turn to the interwebs. It took a full year to even get my first ultrasound (scheduling and denial) and at that first ultrasound, I had a 5cm cyst on each ovary and endo was suspected. After a lap in February 2008 (asymptomatic, severe, stage IV endo) and some recovery and "maybe it'll happen naturally now" time, I finally did my first medicated cycle in September 2008. That's when I found message boards. It kind of blows my mind that I had never trolled this resource before, even in the form of lurking. I could have been so much more prepared for my lap! As it was, I went in totally blind which I now realize was silly and more stressful than if I had discovered this great resource earlier. It took me yet another year to find the blogosphere - and I work as a web developer! Talk about being behind the curve.

Upon joining a board about trying to conceive your first child for more than 6 months, I realized I had found a home. Even better than the kinship was the fact that I got really lucky and happened to join the board at a time when there was an incredible amount of smart, funny, jaded yet-still-ticking IF ladies, many of whom read this blog (hi girls, you know who you are!). Though I haven't met any of you in person, I consider all of you to be true friends who might know me better than most of my RL friends at this point. You know what and where I've been in the past 2 years more than anyone in the world, maybe even more than DH -- as hard as he tries, and he's awesome, it's not the same as being a woman and being the one going through all this.

I swear, I don't think I could have kept powering through, especially after my 2nd loss last fall without the support of these ladies. And I still often go back and read the thread of my ultimately successful IVF#3 in December with a big smile on my face. It was an awful-starting cycle, nothing happened for the first 11 days but then as the cycle finally started building momentum on Day 12, it makes me laugh and cry to read how happy everyone was as follies finally started to pop up, I had a great (for me) ER, ET and finally sticky BFP. Often I was more excited to post my daily news on that thread (and here) than to tell DH, and often - I'll admit - I posted before I told DH ;).

Anyway, the point of this post was not to talk about me but about one the best, sweetest, most supportive people I've met on my journey: Caryn of The Latest Adventures/Someday-soon fame. She and I happened to join the board at around the same time and automatically clicked. She was so upbeat and fun and totally Type-A like me, it actually became fun to analyze imaginary pregnancy symptoms and the weird tests we did, like photo galleries of OPKs. But our friendship was really cemented when we both dove into a string of injectable/IUI cycles in the spring of 2009. For 3-4 months it became like a daily phone call with a good friend, checking in, even if nothing TTC was happening on that day. And the endless BFNs during that season, since the IUIs did not work for either of us, were tolerable because we had each other and we were so sympatico as far as how we handled them: a day of tears and anger, ending with a cheeseburger and margarita and getting back on the horse.

When I got my surprise natural BFP in July 2009, she cheered me on as hard as possible, though I know how hard it is to watch your buddies graduate while you are still in the trenches. And then when I lost Peanut at 10 weeks that fall, she emailed and checked in on me constantly, even though I'm sure I was a total buzzkill as she was flying high on her own ultimately successful IVF. Finally she was one of the biggest cheerleaders during my successful IVF cycle and virtually held my hand as I worried through every ultrasound until my amnio at week 16.

Caryn is a peach, everyone who has interacted with her online (and I'm sure in real life) knows it well. I have no doubt whatsoever that she will be one of the best mommies in the history of the universe. Her little girl Kylie makes her debut tomorrow via c-section and while she doesn't know it yet, I don't think it'll be too long until she realizes that she hit the jackpot in the parental department, as M also seems to be a sweetheart.

So, this post is dedicated to my buddy, Caryn. Congratulations, hon, and:

YIPPY!!!!