Roller coaster day (IVF Stim day 8)

Today was a day of ups and downs, as the IF carnival will often have it.

At this morning's ultrasound, I had one follie at 10mm and a "few" (again, that vague report from my clinic that drives me nuts) at 8 and 9mm. That 12mm follie from Tuesday had done a Houdini and vanished. I had pretty much convinced myself that this was yet another failed cycle and was ready this afternoon, when the nurse called, for her to tell me that we should bail on the cycle. I hadn't yet called in the meds refills, which is the start of my cycle as far as insurance goes but I would have to call them in today because I didn't have enough to get me through the weekend, so today's call was the make or break decision for committing to the cycle.

And...much to my surprise, we've committed to it.

The RE is happy with my slow but steady growth: my E2 had almost doubled since 3 days ago and is now 162. The 3 follies in the race are still smallish at 8.5/9.5/10 but she said that it was not uncommon for ganirelix to slow down the growth especially in low responders -- I'll have to ask my RE more about this. But she also pointed out that I am a unique case -- I laughed and corrected her with "challenge". She said that she and my RE are not comparing me to any norms, but just looking at only me and analyzing the daily changes. So what might be slow for someone else might be just fine for me, etc.

Oh and I asked about the 12mm follie. She did say it may be hiding but thinks the more likely scenario is that it was a residual follie from last cycle (postmature, kind of overstaying its welcome) or a small follicular cyst. She said my E2 levels from Tuesday to today were compatible with the 3 small follies she's seeing now.

So, I'm in this cycle with both feet, I suppose. If I can get to ER with these 3 follies, I'll be happy. NoodleGuy and I just booked our Christmas flight to Texas (my family) for Dec 21st, so that's pretty much a guarantee that I'll stim well into the week of Dec 14th, just to give me heart palpitations over squeezing in ET before we leave. As per my usual luck, it seems like we'll have to fly shortly after ET, but I can't worry about that yet. For now I just need to even make it to ER which is obviously not a slam dunk for me.

I'm trying really, really hard not to get too stressed out or overemotional about this cycle. I know I'm a very poor responder so I'm willing to take whatever my body is willing to give me at this point. I'm trying hard to appreciate my body for the things it does well and not slam it too badly for the few areas where it behaves like a toothless meth addict.

We're off to the North End (Little Italy) for dinner tonight, I'm going to drown my worries in some lobster ravioli!

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CYCLE STATS:

Day 5
E2: 98.5
Follies: 1 @ 12m, a few <9mm

Day 8
E2: 162
Follies: 1@ 8.5mm, 1 @ 9.5mm and 1 @ 10mm

Next check - Day 11, Monday 12/7

*I'm giving up on my super awesome comparison chart that I did last cycle both because Blogger has broken my spirit in how difficult it is to create HTML tables in it (and I'm a web developer by trade!) and because I feel foolish creating spreadsheets when I'm very possibly doomed to failure every cycle. Maybe I'll be a post-cycle chart if I make it through ET this time. I know you're all waiting with baited breath! ;)