One year ago today

One year ago today, Bug was being brought to me for the very first time. He had spent the first three days of his existence in a chilly petri dish and came back to mom with three of his brothers and sisters. One of those siblings was strong enough to nestle in with him but by late January, we lost that bean and Bug would have mommy all to himself. How I got lucky enough for my body or my RE or a higher power to find that one egg in my decrepit ovaries that would finally stick and bring me this bundle of love and joy, I'll never know.

Things are going really well in the Bug household though very, very busy. Which is the reason that I have gone an insane 6 weeks between posts. Basically, I last posted as I was heading back to work in early November and I have not been able to find the time to post since then. Of course I'd have a little time here and there, but I always meant to post something more meaningful than a quickie 5 minute post and then the day would get away from me.

It's been challenging juggling work and baby, kudos to single parents and those with multiple kids, I don't know how you do it. Part of the challenge in my situation is how we've set up day care for Bug. On Mondays and Thursdays he is at a daycare center full-time. On Tuesdays and Wednesdays my in-laws come over to watch, at least from Tuesday afternoon through Wednesday afternoon. And on Fridays we originally had him in daycare but have since dropped that day. It's a benefit financially to do 2 days instead of 3, obviously, but it was more that I was really missing just a mommy & Buggie day, so now I just have him home with me. I do work on Fridays, I try to get as much done as I can while he naps or plays and then I catch up over the weekend. So, to recap, all of above means that I power-work on Mondays & Thursdays when he is in daycare, trying to get as much done on those two days as possible. On the days my in-laws are here, they're very helpful in allowing me to pop out for an hour here and there for conference calls or to take care of urgent work. I do, however, still do alot of babycare on those days as I still change his diapers when needed, make all his bottles, come running when I hear him crying.  On the diaper front, the one time the in-laws tried it, it resulted in a diaper put on backwards and so loose that it fell off when I picked him up, and wouldn't you know it? It was a poopie diaper, which then got all over me, haha. I'm sure the opportunity will arise again for the grandparents to need to change him but for now, we're all more comfortable with me still doing that part every few hours. I'm trying to be better about not running when I hear him crying -- his grandparents would chop off their arms to make sure he's OK and his crying is always just for one reason: food, food, food. Once you pop a bottle is his mouth, he's all smiles.

Anyway, trying get all my work done with only two true daycare days has been hard, especially during the holiday season since I work for an online retailer. It's been so hectic, including me being on-call all 4 days of the Thanksgiving weekend (and being paged several times), but sure be slowing down now as tomorrow is the last day customers can order to still receive merchandise by Christmas, plus everyone will start going on vacation. All the hecticness aside, I am so aware of how lucky I am to have this kind of flexible schedule, both in working from home but also having a very good relationship with my managers. I get to see my boy 5 days out of 7, only have 2 days where I have to see his little face light up when I go to pick him up from daycare (gratifying but heartbreaking simultaneously), that I'll take being stretched thin any time in exchange for having the opportunity to be with him so much.

As for my managers, when I sent an email asking about a shift in hours I was requesting on some days, I got the following response: "Do whatever you need to do, whatever hours. No need to even ask." So, wow. Yes, I realize how lucky I am. While I will say that that kind of trust and flexibility has been earned over the 7 years I've worked with these people, working all-nighters, weekends and trying to be as good a teammate to everyone around me as possible, it still is awesome to know I can work full-time but make my job balance with my life. I still work some evenings and weekends to make up for any extra work coming my way, but things had been do-able. One of the reasons I wanted some flexbility is that I really didn't want to loose touch with my mommy group once my maternity leave ended. I worked it out so that on Tuesdays, before my in-laws arrive, I take a early/long lunch from 10am-1pm so that we can get together and let the babies roll around and the mommies can chat. On those Tuesdays, I work from 8-10am while Bug  naps and then from 1-6:30pm. So I still do my 7.5 hours, but I get to keep cultivating these new friendships for my son and myself. Those Tuesdays are hectic, but it's worth it.

In others news, we went down to visit my family in Texas this past week. We usually go between Thanksgiving and New Years since it's so much cheaper. The visit was great and my sisters and niece and nephew loved the baby, not to mention my mom loved seeing him again. The airport and plane ride went pretty smoothly, he slept almost the whole way there and back, no ears popping. The only blip was a blowout dirty diaper on the way home which necessitated me bringing him back to our seats naked except for his diaper, as the change of clothes was back at the seat. Everyone who saw us chuckled, as I expect most knew the reason for the birthday suit ;).

As for Bug himself, he is 100% fantastic. He'll be 4 months old (!!) on Christmas Eve and in this past week alone has made great strides. His very favorite thing to do right now is stand (with assistance, of course). If we try to put him down when he's in a standing mood? Oh, the wrath of the Bug! Though he's still on the little side of it (his toes barely brush the ground), he's been enjoying his jumperoo lately, until he hits a wall and then needs out, stat. He also loves playing with mommy's hand, just grabbing one finger after the other, while piles and piles of toys from his grandparents and cousins and aunts stream in from the post office, it's still good ol' mommy's hand that takes the cake.

He'll be getting his 4 months shots in a week and a half and probably also a recommendation from the pediatrician to start a sleep schedule. We are NOT looking forward to that! I've tried a few times putting him in his crib when he was sleepy and after about 10 minutes of entertaining himself, he'll start sobbing and we've only lasted about 5 minutes before giving in. He's a pretty good sleeper but ALWAYS falls asleep for naps while eating. We're hoping that when he starts eating cereal (probably after his 4 month visit) that he won't be so hungry all the time. I know the bottle is always partly a comfort thing for sleeping and that'll be a harder habit to break.

As for nighttime sleeping, it's pretty good. We've been putting him to sleep around 8:30pm, he'll usually sleep about 6 hours until 2:30am and then if we're lucky - after feeding and changing him - we can get him to sleep from 3am to 6am. Some nights don't work that perfectly but I'd say 6 out of 7 nights work pretty well. Noodleguy and I have it set it so that I do the first "get up" on weeknights, he does it on weekends. So on the good nights, he gets to sleep through the night on weekdays, me on weekends. It works pretty well to keep us all fairly well-rested, as I "could" nap on weekdays if I had to. I put it in quotes because it's yet to happen, but a girl can dream ;). I will say that it has been nice putting the baby to bed earlier at 8:30. We used to keep him up with us until about 10:30, in a desperate effort to reduce the amount of wake-ups overnight. But since he's pretty reliable for a 6-hour stretch these days, going down earlier works for him and allows Noodleguy and I a couple of hours of "us" time to watch a movie or snuggle or whatever.

Finally, you might notice that all posts in my archive are hidden. I've been pondering a move to Wordpress since they allow password protection or just allowing this blog to be available to approved readers. I've become increasingly uncomfortable with posting names, pictures and information on a blog that anyone can find. Plus I've read one too many articles lately about how once you post something online, it's out there forever. I don't want to post something that Bug will later regret that I did, when he runs for president ;). Plus, there's been a firm request from Noodleguy that I make the blog more private, so there you are.  I'm leaning towards Wordpress as I'd like to leave the pre-pregnancy part of this blog out there  - without identifiable information - for other women, particularly poor responders, from which to perhaps find comfort and hope. When I decide what to do, hopefully this week, I'll let you all know and will give you info on the password, should you desire.

Anyway, I'm glad to be back and hope I can post more frequently. I have been trying to keep up to date with all of your blogs and while I know I've been a horrible commenter lately, I hope to make up for it in the coming weeks!